This hit is a long time in the making, and ZeroTwo was never the original target.
Once upon a time, there was a little gremlin named AGFS...
AGFS liked to pick on the smaller members of LTL, just because he could bully them around. One thing to know about AGFS is that he HATED MikeGrinder. With a passion. Doesn't matter when, where, how, if he had the opportunity to hit him, he would.
Unfortunately, back in February Mike had to step away from his account, and he handed it off to me. Sensing an opportunity, we kept this handover on the down low, and put together a plan to take care of LTL's AGFS problem once and for all. This was kept so quiet, even our fearless leader Kip was kept in the dark, under the impression I was passing off my previous account and stepping away from the game. Firstly, I built 30k RIPs, and queued 200k more on my moon. I also queued up some research on the planet below, so I would have some res to insta Recyclers. Then I gave AGFS some poking and prodding, and waited for him to take the bait.
That "poking and prodding" threw AGFS into a full fledged temper tantrum, with IPM parties in both directions, and culminating with a one man declaration of war against the entire alliance. During this time we discovered that it was a good thing we kept the account handoff quiet - AGFS had a spy inside our alliance, feeding online times; no wonder he was able to hit LTL members so reliably! Unfortunately, being the coward he was, AGFS gave up once he lost his informant, and went perma-VM, eventually merging to Uni1. So long, good riddance.
Once in Thuban, I finally renamed the account, and got back into my own skin. Slightly annoyingly, my planet with the 200k RIPs queued was moved to slot 6 during the merge, so I couldn't relocate it back into slot 8, but the potential value of the ninja outweighed the value of the relocation. Additionally, I unfortunately got hit in the interim, leaving me with ~8k RIPs.
Fast forward to today.
There I was, minding my own business, when a little birdy probed that moon and spotted my fleet there, with around 14G res. Now, it would be a bit of a stretch for this birdy to make a move from so far down in the ranks, but I saw that his moon stayed lit, and I figured he was watching.
With reset coming around, I deliberately timered going into reset, and logged 8 minutes late, with a buddy keeping an eye out for me. When I logged, what did I see, but 14kk Cruisers incoming in about 8 minutes!
Now, the funny thing is, right before reset, the wife asked me to run to the pharmacy to pick up an order. When I late logged, I was a couple blocks from home. I quickly messaged my team to confirm 200k RIPs would do fine against 14kk Cruisers, and ran to my computer with about 3 minutes to spare.
With confirmation that I was good, I waited and insta'd with seconds left, and grabbed as much of the DF as I could. My only regret is for the lives of those poor Cargo Pilots. To take a page from Shrek: "Some of you may die, but it is a sacrifice I am willing to make".
Attacker was a good sport. Messaged me a bit after the hit offering congrats. Someone pointed out to me, this may be the first time the attacker has ended up on the wrong side of a HoF; he didn't have any in Quad, and this is the first in Thuban. In the grand scheme of things it's not a huge amount of points for you, but I'm sure it will be annoying to clog up your queues with 14kk ships.
BUYING DEUT! Message in game!
On 08-06-2024 --:--:--, the following fleets met in battle:
Attacker Zero Two [APE]
________________________________________________
Cruiser 14.000.000
Espionage Probe 86
_________________________________________
Defender The Joker [LTL]
________________________________________________
Small Cargo 2
Large Cargo 690.599
Light Fighter 1
Heavy Fighter 5
Cruiser 509
Colony Ship 18
Recycler 857
Espionage Probe 2.651
Destroyer 2
Deathstar 207.927
Battlecruiser 1
Reaper 2
Pathfinder 2
Plasma Turret 100.000
Small Shield Dome 1
Large Shield Dome 1
_________________________________________
After the battle ...
Attacker Zero Two [APE]
________________________________________________
Destroyed!
_________________________________________
Defender The Joker [LTL]
________________________________________________
Small Cargo 0 ( -2 )
Large Cargo 0 ( -690.599 )
Light Fighter 0 ( -1 )
Heavy Fighter 0 ( -5 )
Cruiser 0 ( -509 )
Colony Ship 0 ( -18 )
Recycler 0 ( -857 )
Espionage Probe 0 ( -2.651 )
Destroyer 0 ( -2 )
Deathstar 207.927 ( -0 )
Battlecruiser 0 ( -1 )
Reaper 0 ( -2 )
Pathfinder 0 ( -2 )
Plasma Turret 0 ( -100.000 )
Small Shield Dome 0 ( -1 )
Large Shield Dome 0 ( -1 )
_________________________________________
The defender has won the battle!
The attacker lost a total of 406.000.086.000 units.
The defender lost a total of 21.321.645.000 units.
At these space coordinates now float 142.081.448.500 metal, 51.077.850.500 crystal and 14.001.506.500 deuterium.
The chance for a moon to be created from the debris was 20%.
________________________________________________
combatreport.harvest.defender.captured
5.013.076.620 metal, 5.013.076.620 crystal and 5.013.076.621 deuterium
2.915.370.466 metal, 2.915.370.466 crystal and 2.915.370.468 deuterium
5.013.076.620 metal, 5.013.076.620 crystal and 5.013.076.621 deuterium
13.972.943.574 metal, 13.972.943.574 crystal and 1.059.982.790 deuterium
85.378.970.414 metal, 0 crystal and 0 deuterium
0 metal, 0 crystal and 0 deuterium
combatreport.harvest.defender.total
112.293.437.694 metal, 26.914.467.280 crystal and 14.001.506.500 deuterium
Summary of profit/losses:
Summary attackers(s)
Metal: -280.000.000.000
Crystal: -98.000.086.000
Deuterium: -28.000.000.000
The attacker(s) lost a total of 406.000.086.000 units.
Summary defender(s)
Metal: 103.130.480.694
Crystal: 17.758.792.280
Deuterium: 10.998.493.500
The defender(s) made a profit of 131.887.766.474 units.
wow congrats on the ninja well done 
keep up the good work, not everyone can brag about fact that they ninjaed 02. But slowly and surely your time will come eventually 
